It Wasn't Enough Chap:10

I emit a loud sigh, and look back at my super best friend who decided he wanted to help me with my problems. Stan was still thinking though.  When I first sat down in maths, he had asked how my appointment went and naturally I told him, and then asked his opinion on weather I should get an abortion or not. I hardly got any sleep last night thinking it over. Then that would make me think about what Cartman would do, and then my thoughts would be completely consumed by him. Weather it was just because I was carrying his DNA, my hormones or maybe that I was actually starting to have feelings for him, I didn't know. I don't see a reason why it would be the later, nothing has really changed; he hasn't suddenly become a nicer person, in all honesty he's become worst, ignoring me and the fact he will a child. Or might have a child; since there's still the chance to get it out of me. Maybe it was just that I didn't want to do this alone, and my mind was instantly turning to Cartman as the solution. But it felt like more than that. I truly hate to admit it, but I miss him, if only for the little arguments we have. I hear a cough, snapping me out of my thoughts, and turn to the source of the noise. "I don't want to give my opinion." Stan finally says. I just continue to stare at him, in both confusion and annoyance. I had been waiting, for that? Whatever…
"That's fine; I've made up my mind anyway." Stan raised a questioning eyebrow at me, but I smiled and turned back to the equation on the board.

I shoved food back in my mouth before answering Bebe's question, "yeah, it's fine, perfectly healthy." 'At the moment', I added in my head. It's not as if it was important anymore. Bebe smiled sweetly at me, unaware of what was going on in my head.
"I jizz right in my pants every time you're next to me, and when we're holding hands it's like having sex to me." The newly arrived Kenny grabs my hand and winks at me.
"Thanks Ken," I say sarcastically, shaking his hand off. "Think you can go a day without singing Lonely Island?" He just smiles and half shrugs.
"Do you know what it is yet?" Clyde asks from next to Bebe.
"No, you don't find out till its like 20 weeks gone or something, I'm only 9 weeks." I hadn't even noticed Cartman approaching us till I heard him groan, annoyed.
"Are you still going the fuck on about that?" He laughs while I glared at him.
"What is your problem Cartman?" Bebe asks confused.
"Come on, you can all believe he's pregnant. You're just pulling a sick joke aren't you Kahl?" I got up and started to walk away. Behind me I heard Cartman slam his tray onto the table before his horrid voice followed, "just fucking admit it you Jew freak!" I stopped as the whole canteen turned quiet. Slowly turning around I walked up to him, but stopped about a meter away. Silently, I lifted my arms to stretch out at my sides.
"If you really believe this is just one whole fucking joke, then fucking hit me, we'll see what happens then, either way I won't be pregnant anymore," I smiled at him and stood waiting. Then time seemed to slow down as I saw him raise his fist, and was only slightly shocked as it started to move towards me. Before I knew it Cartman was now lying on the floor holding his lip which was starting to bleed. I turned my head as I lowered my arms to see Stan panting, fists still clenched.
"You fucking disgust me," he hissed at the piece of shit on the floor. Stan then turned to me, face softening slightly, and gently grabbed my arm pulling me out of the canteen and view of watchful eyes. "You wanted him to hit you didn't you?" He muttered to me with disappointment…I didn't answer.

I walked home by myself; I really just wanted to be alone. He went to hit me, and still I want him. What is wrong with me? Everything will be fine soon. Fine and back to normal, or as normal as this town can get. "Kyle!" A voice shouts behind me and I recognise it instantly.
"Go away Butters! I'm not in the mood!" I shout back without turning around.
"Eric doesn't like that you're having his child Kyle." I sigh before starting to turn around.
"I don't ca-" I cut myself off as I see what the blonde is holding. A knife; sunlight bouncing off the shiny surface. "B-Butters?" I asked warily, not taking my eyes of the sharp object.
"Eric doesn't like that you're having his child…Kyle" he repeats before I start to run.